Heartfelt Retirement Wishes for Your brother the writer. Funny

Dearest Brother, so you've finally hung up your pen! Retirement, eh? I always knew you'd eventually run out of witty remarks – or at least run out of time to craft them into compelling prose. Congratulations on escaping the tyranny of deadlines and the existential dread of writer's block. May your days be filled with naps, uninterrupted coffee consumption, and the sweet, sweet sound of silence (unless you decide to write the Great American Novel...you know...for fun). Seriously though, enjoy this new chapter. You earned it! Now go forth and conquer… the couch.